September 10, 2004


I had a whole post written out that was a response to a political poll which I found maddening. The gist of the message was this:

The absurdity of thinking that George Bush is more "trustworthy" is daunting. How do you get through to voters who have no sense? America may just deserve George Bush.

I decided not to post it because spreading all that negativity was just making me feel bad. Writing hate and paranoia about George Bush isn’t cathartic. In fact, it may just make me feel worse--about the future of the country, the world, my basic faith in humanity. I really can’t live like that. Anyone who reads this blog is probably not going to be swayed either way, so it doesn’t really serve a purpose. Somehow I just have to stay positive when faced with the weird illogic out there in the real world.

There are certain issues that I’d rather tackle in fiction, namely in "The American Book of the Dead." There I can at least poke fun at certain things. Satire is much more cathartic than hate. It’s certainly less worrisome. Fiction just comes from a different part of the brain--it’s less reactionary, more forward-thinking. This is true even if the fiction is hate-fueled and paranoid. Fiction has a life of its own, a diary does not in the same way. I am glad I have the option.

This is not saying that I’m going to lobotomize myself. There’s a great amount of stupidity out there, and I can’t help but feel it. Really I enjoy writing about it. I’ll still write about some of the ideas that led me to write a book about the apocalypse, UFOs, and other dementia. But without so much fear. Fear is worse than hate, it is more of an uncontrollable emotion. Oftentimes hate is made of opinion. Fear is involuntary.

As you might have noticed, I am a writer who’s very hard on himself. I rewrite myself constantly--in life and on paper. You have to be to a certain degree if you ever want to improve. But you can’t be so much that it’s paralyzing. I usually revise things a thousand times before I show them to people. Here, I’m publishing in real time. John Steinbeck wrote daily journals when he wrote The Grapes of Wrath and East of Eden. I want this blog to be something like that, not a deranged pulpit.


darling maggot said...

it's his christian faith. bush knew being a born again had to help him in something. the other thing that gets me is how people say, "well he believes in SOMETHING." how the hell does that make him worth piss? al qaeda believe in something, too.

ironically, for all his faith and conservative values, this is the most dishonest and corrupt president we've had in the 'house since nixon.

tequilita said...

thank you for not preaching. i've read what you have on American Book of the Dead...fascinating. can't wait to see how it comes along. i am currently undecided as to my vote. but i sure as hell don't need anyone calling me illogical or stupid for not readily jumping on the kerry bandwagon. it's a turn off when someone has to make fun of others to affirm him/herself, which is essentially what political rants sound like sometimes. assuming the stupidity of someone who doesn't see things your way, is stupidity. and i agree about fiction and satire, the most affecting messages are conveyed with a story, not a sermon. anyway, looking forward to the story.

Henry Baum said...

I can understand not being sold on Kerry. I can understand being worried about another terrorist attack. Short of that, I don't understand voting for George Bush. The man basically does nothing right. I can't resist preaching somewhat.

Maggot, I would say Bush is the worst President since Reagan, or even his father. People call Reagan a great patriot because he won the Cold War. He won by crippling the Soviet Union with military spending. If the Big One ever goes down, it will be using weapons he built up.

darling maggot said...

yes that's the big reagan joke. he won the cold war. bullshit--the soviet union just went bankrupt. i also like how he brought down the berlin wall and so forth. whatever.

the thing about bush is, unless you're rich and voting for him out of fiscal reasons, i don't get it. he certainly doesn't have the best interests of the people at heart. it's tragic seeing half this country vote for him because they think he's one of their own. he really isn't. he's as blue blooded as kerry can be accused of. just because he sounds like a good ol' boy doesn't make him one.

Anonymous said...

the reason i love writing so much, is that, until you press send, or show someone you writing, it's temporary. it's nothing but whats in your head in front of your eyes. i think that's amazing.

xo. war.

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