Baum

I am not related to L. Frank Baum. I wish I could say I am but I’m not. I am related to Friedrich Gustav Jacob Henle, discoverer of the Henle’s Loops which are in everybody’s kidneys. I’m also related to Artemas Ward who commanded the troops at Bunker Hill and was a Congressman. I think this entitles me to enlistment in the Illuminati. He comes from my Dad’s mom’s gentile side of the family. He has nothing to do with the 19th century satirist of the same name who used it as a pen name and I guess took it from General Artemas Ward--a kind of satirical character who my grandfather said weighed 400 pounds and had to be carried into battle. If he was so heavy, how did they carry him? I don’t know, but my grandfather likes to tell this story over and over again. I’m also related to a man who was on the team at GE who invented Silly Putty. Finally, I’m related to a guy who didn’t trust banks so he kept his life savings in the closet, thousands of dollars. One night, he was robbed of everything. It made the Newark, NJ papers.